Faith Camp - Saturday / Sunday

Today was the first day of Faith Camp. I drove up there after staying at Tom's for the night (he broke 3 meta-tarsells - foot bones and was going to be my navigator), we only left his house 1 1/2 hours late hehe but it's all good. We picked Joanne up and then had to pop into my house and pick up the kettle which I'd realised I'd left at home. After Mum's dire predictions of the roads being hideous unless we left at 6am we arrived in Peterborough after 2 hours 10 mins. A great trip, I don't think we stopped once, and made no wrong turnings :)

So we get to Faith Camp at 10ish only to find out that Tom's mum and dad hadn't left yet (his mum wasn't very well and they didn't arrive until 4pm hmmnn. Also, we had to wait until gone 12pm until the Pitchers arrived for us to arrange where we would pitch the tent (when we got it).

Anyway, it was good, and had something to eat and then we went to the meeting. I went to 'The Move' with Rachel (Tom went to the main meeting). What happened was really cool, it was over 2 hours (more like 2 and 1/2 hours) of full-on worship. It was fantastic!!

I've decided that this week I want God to show His love for me and to show me how I can love Him. This is my plan for this week.

I'm going to be posting a lot of stuff about what happened at Camp and it's going to be lots to do with the meetings and what's said in them (I'm basically posting my notes from the meetings here becasue I want to share all that happened).

God bless you all

Love Southend - Day 4 & Day 5

I'm sorry, it's actually the 8th of August now (I've been to Faith Camp (more on that in later posts).

Not too much was really said in these meetings, it was mostly rounding up what we had done. On Thursday I spent working in another church (Southchurch Park URC) - hehe we were meant to tidy the garden of bindweed, this church has a front garden which to us (me and 2 15 year olds) looked fine, and a back which looked hideous. It had a bindweeky-type substance on the ground, but we were told the job would only take about 1/2 an hour, now this job was going to take more than half an hour more like the whole day. We started on this job clearing away and slogged away (oh yeah, it started to rain for 2 or 3 minutes) and eventaully had to phone Jacky about needing black sacks. After a bit, (me and Kat were clearing the back and putting it into the sacks - Jacky had found the bindweed in the front we were supposed to clear). Jack spoke to the person we were doing the job for, it turns out me, Kat and Becca Churchward had cleared the wrong place (we were meant to have done the front - which we did - and not the back), they were going to clear the back on Saturaday. heheh They were very pleased with what we'd done though and it's pretty funny when you think about it.

Friday was the fun day at Cluny Square, it went pretty well. Me and a group of others spent most of it filling water balloons and transporting them (in my car) to the fun day. Lots of kids showed up (a few from Hamstel) - it went very well and from what I've heard quite a few went to the beach bash (I was at Faith Camp when it was on).

Love Southend - Day 3

God has set me free, but I don't know how to live as a free man. God teach me to live as a free man!!! - During the worship, this is what I prayed because it's true, and God helped me in that but I've got to learn to do some of it in myself in not going back into my chains which I am quite comfortable in sometimes. I've been freed some times but I just don't know how to live freely and gradually I go back to how I was, but I want to be free. It's like the guy in 'Shawshank Redemption' who when he gets out of prision, he can't handly it and it all ends badly. I wont end up like him, but I'm not sure how to live freely and I can sometimes look and see my chains lying there and it just reminds me of stuff and it makes it hard. But after today, God's made it easier for me. Praise God. I know it's going to be a struggle and a certain amount of re-programming (in a way) is going to have to happen in my life if I'm going to live freely. In my 24 years, and certainly the last (at least) 10 years, I've programmed myself to behave and think in a certain away (also, the way people have treated me) has programmed me and done things to me which has messed me up and that's part of the problem and it's on going and I just have to give it up to God and not take it back.

Anyway, I'm not sure of his name, but it was a Vineyard guy giving the preach today:

Be ready to server at the drop of a hat. Always be ready to serve!!! Wherever you are, light fires (server). Do it wherever you can in whatever way you can. Make a decision to server oneanother (in the church).

When you server, do it as if you aer serving God, not men.

Whenever you can, take the lower seat and let God invite you up. See the jobs that need to be done and do it quietly and with a smile and see what Jesus does for you.

We don't just have to do somethin boring. What do you enjoy doing? That's a good indication of where we can serve. Do something you enjoy. What are you good at? What are your dreams?

"Preach the gospel at every possible time and in every possible way and if all else fails, use words" - he though Spurgeon said this.

After the preach we were given to opportunity to have prayer for faith to go out and do things, it was praying for faith which is something I needed and something I'd been praying for during the worship. God did come through becuase I was praying for faith for letting go of the past (see the above) and I did feel different after - I just need to be living it.

The weather wasn't all that good today but I'm not all that bothered by it - I kinda like working in the light rain and I (don't think) I'd bother if it were pouring down. We were basically finishing off but it too quite a long time (the whole afternoon). It's practially done now and I think maybe an hour more of shovelling the earth and it'd be totally finished.

We had the MP (Member of Parliment) for Southend show up and see what we were doing - alhtough I didn't vote for him ;-) he was a nice guy. Trever (one of the main Love Southend Youth guys) interviewed him for the DVD. A few questions in a Trev asked the inevitable 'What churches do you think are takin part in Love Southend?' to which the MP replied 'Ive only seen Southend Christian Fellowship' (Wrong answer - all Southend churches are taking part) - the next questions came right away 'What do you think about Jesus Christ?' we were tryin to stifle a laugh (me an Jacky) at the directness of the question as well as the braveness of it. We were laughing so much (or stunned) that we didn't hear the answer :( Hopefully tomorrow it will be played on the screen so I'll post the answer :)

Tomorrow we are probably painting a garrage and then finishing off Lournes Close.

It was really good today and I feel we've accomplished a lot. Dinner was really good, and I didn't want to stay for the evening event, I just needed a bath (I still ache). I was shovelling earth and the sweat was running off me, a great feeling doing such hard work and I really enjoy doing it and I've love to do it again. It gives you a great chance to talk to God and to hear from Him and I want to do it again :-)

The batteries ran out in my phone and I didn't get a chance to get any photos of our finished work so I hope I can take some tomorrow.

Well I'm tired and I need sleep, but I'm still takin my brother to work tomorrow.

Faith Camp and Russia are so close, but I just can't think about them at the moment. I'm so enjoying Love Southend Youth and I don't want it to end.

Well, my results for uni are official now, I got the official letter from uni today and it feels good to know those results are official. Yaay!

Good night guys.

Love Southend - Day 2

The meeting kicked off very well, it Paul Gutteridge was speaking, we'd seen him at Faith Camp and he's from a church from Chelmsford which is local(ish). Following are my notes from what was said:

God's power is for the streets, if you hear someone complain about pain etc. go and pray for them. We will have fear and trembling, don't trust it. Step out and do it!! God wants to confirm His word in the world. God uses us to do that.

Ambassadors have no authority in their own land, but in a foreign land they have will have all the power. We are an ambassador on Earth.

We need to 'talk their language'. Understand where they come from - don't shut yourself away from the world but get into the things they are so we can talk.

If we do something and they ask a question and we give the answer 'Jesus' it's good, but if we give the answer before the question, it's bible bashing.

We don't have to answer people's problems right away but we can ask if we can go away and get the answer. It's okay to feel weak, so long as we know God is strong. A good 4 letter prayer is HELP. Ask God to give us insite into people's lives. It's okay to go away and then come back with an answer, they'll accept that more than an answer on the spot which will be wrong.

Signs and wonders are good. Signs point (we are signs) and wonders make people wonder where they came from.

Sometimes we need to be like a donkey stumbling along with Jesus on our back. Just trust Jesus. Ask God for insite into people's lives.

When we do community action, the spirit of the Lord is upon us. It's not a feeling, it's true and biblical.

Leaving the peaches on the window means they'll soak up the sun and dry up and wont get eaten. They are meant to be eaten. Worship is like us standing in the sun, we can dry up in the sun. We are meant to be smelt and tasted and to be light. We need to be out being smelt and tasted and to be light to the world.

Allow God to open wild situation if we don't have the answer, ask someone!!!!

God doesn't always give us everything right away because He doesn't want us to all be spoilt brats.

It was great encouridgement to actually be told how to evangelise, dispite being told that we must to it.

The work was good, at least it didn't rain. We had graffiti remover today and got rid of most of it but we could have done with twice the amount we had at least to get rid of it all. The other groups did a great job of clearing everything and there was just a little bit left, mostly tidying.

It's such a satisfying feeling doing good hard work for God. So far no one has asked us what we're doing but that isn't so much a problem for me, I quite like doing work like that but I need help with talking to people which will come with practice.

The evening part was good also, I was tired though and just wanted to curl up in a corner and sleep.

Oh oh, Tom broke his foot. There was a skateboard ramp and people were running down it, and Tom slipped and foot. He'll still be going to Faith Camp but he'll be with His parents in their caravan so I'll still be able to go.

I'm going to try and get the photos up soon. I promise.

God bless you guys

Love Southend - Day 1

Okay, I'm very tired but I want to blog about yesterday and today before tomorrow and I have another day to write about.

Yesterday (Sunday) was verty good. The Youth Band (TYB) were fantastic and I totally mean that. The worhsip was great and just so worshipful. God was so there and the youth and people involved in the youth mission got prayed for. Today was a day when I decided to finally give everything over to God in my life, something I've done and failed in a number of times, but something that God keeps on bugging me to do recently. We need to ask God to break our chains so that we can show the people we meet that they can be free too. Any areas that we struggle with, we need to ask for freedom because that is essentially part of what God offers us and part of what He's giving us and them.

The evening meeting was good also, the band were good also, and played some new songs which I sometimes find hard. The band did very well but they were tired as they'd been at it so much over the past few days / weeks and I guess months.


Today it kicked off properly. The meeting was really good and the band (I think it was Christchurch) was great! Plus points for singing the Third Day song 'God of Wonders'. At the end of the meeting we got into our groups. The group is quite diverse and we have a number of different ages and from different churches and areas.

We were working at Lornes Close which is basically waste land (photos to follow). There was an area which looked like people had been fly-tipping and so I decided to work on that area. The rest of the group worked on the rest of the area (they chose where to work) and some worked on that area too. We're there tomorrow and that's a good thing, we have lots of grafiti to get rid of and still more garden stuff to get rid of. It wasn't the best weather to be outside working and it did rain for a bit but we kept on working :)

The evening was good also, St. Luke's Church did a fantastic job of feeding us. The evening ended with some good worship also and people sharing their testimoney or anything that God had given them.

Well, it's sleepy time for me and I'm taking Chips (my brother - Christopher) to work early tomorrow and then going round to a ladies house to take down her curtains so another group can wash and put them up again.

This post may change tomorrow when I've rested.

God bless you all and I'll try and get some photos up soon (all from my camera phone, and they're pretty nice :))

So, Love Southend Youth starts tomorrow - this is going to be very interesting and I hope to blog every day of it here. Today me and some others (please forgive the vagueness of this post, I'm very tired) did leaflet droppings and asked to put posters in shop windows. This afternoon from 5:30 I helped at the centre doing little jobs like photocopying and sorting the T-Shirts (which look GREAT!!!). The band was sounding excellent and I only heard 2 songs whilst the P.A. was being set up so they weren't even properly worshipping at that time. Guys you're sounding great!!! (but none of you know this address so you can't read it :0). Looking foward to the Youth Band (TYB) playing tomorrow at church, I just hope they are at the right sound level and aren't turned down.

Also, today I was looking after Lilly, Joyce and Katie's dog. I've decided to never have a dog (at least not a Shitsu-type dog). Every time I came back from the house, I felt dirty - just the smell and the licking ewwwww!!! Also, I took some work to do but couldn't get anything done because the dog kept barking and demanding my attention - grrr arrrg.

Kinda cool though, I found a wireless hotspot in Joyce's house, but I think it was proxied, or encrypted becasue although I could get an I.P. address, I couldn't use the 'net :( so I nearly had 'net access but not quite. All part of the joys of having wireless (or not). I (stupidly/kindly) have open access which can be a bad idea, but also, I don't mind sharing my connection with people, I don't really max-out my connection and if anyone who can receive the connection wants to use it (for legit purposes) they can.

I'm now getting ready for 'Faith Camp' just getting my gear ready and desperatly tidying my room which is in such a state at the moment, I'm going to finish tomorrow I hope, but I also need to wash the car - I should be able to get it all done, but it's been such a long week but at least the meetings next week don't start until 10am so I can lay in (unless my brother wants a lift to work - he does paint-spraying and starts work at 7am meaning leaving home at 6:40 and getting up at 6:20/6:30 :( ).

Okay, the randomness of this post shows how tired I am - still, no church duties tomorrow so a bit of a lay-in yaaay!. I got up at 7:00 today to let the dog out - grrr.

So, I'll be off now and I'll post tomorrow about the first day of 'Love Southend'!!!

God bless

So, I've now got my results in from my course and they are very encouridging. Below are the results:

Distributed Systems: Assignment 1: 64% Assignmnet 2: 75% Exam: 72% Average: 70.%
Graduate Skills: Assignment 1: 67% Exam: 62% Average: 65.5%
OOP: Assignment 1: 68% Exam: 81% Average: 75.8%
LANs: Assignment 1: 75% Exam: 92% Average: 85.2%
WANs: Assignment 1: 72% Exam: 85% Average: 79.8%
Client Server Cfg: Assignment 1: 100% Exam: 59% Average: 79.5% Group Project Assignment 1: 68% Average: 68%

That means that my overall average is 74.5% which is a first class pass (for the 2nd year). I'm very happy with these results and it means I can start next year knowing that I've almost passed the course on just these marks so anything next year is adding to the degree.

I'd love to get a 1st Class degree just to know that it's possible for me to do something well accademically, but it's also totally God. I'm usually rubbish in exams and I've noticed that when I pray, God comes and helps me in the revision and the exams.

Priase God.

Next weeks is Love Southend and I hope to blog some stuff about it and maybe add some pictures, but I hope to add something soon, so until then.

Byee *waves*

Love with a pure heart.

As part of being decipled by Peter who's really into the books of 1 and 2 Timothy, I've undertaken a study of these 2 books. I've never done a proper bible study before and I'm looking forward to it.

I have gone through the 2 books and made notes before looking at study notes and guides and the main thing that popped out at me was 1 Timothy 1:5 "The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith." I had to ask myself after reading this, 'Do I love with a pure heart' - I believe that this isn't just refering to love for God, but for love for other people. So... do I?

I'd have to say in most cases no. I think it's pretty hard to love with a pure heart, loving no matter what they do or are like. I think this type of love is only possible through the Holy Spirit and also maybe just perseverence with people. Sometimes I think God does things and puts people in our lives to change us but maybe the type of changing that WE need to do to show God how much we love Him and also for our own personal development.

It's also about loving people for the right reasons, living them in a spirit-filled way and not just a human way. I want to love people with a pure heart and a good conscience. I want to loose the humanistic side and allow the Godly side through the Holy Spirit to come through so that my love for the people in my life (not just Christians, but non-Christians) will mirror the love that God has for them and God is pure, God is love and so His love is pure.

So that is my hope and my prayer for now.

Lord, Father teach me to love with a pure heard and good conscience. Let there be no motive behind my love for the people in my life. Help me to love the people in my life I find it hard to love, and the people I love for the wrong reasons, show me how to love them with purity. Father, teach me to love these people in the way you love them. In Jesus name I pray. Amen

Keep your heart soft.

The Sunday meeting was really really good and I took copius notes which I'd like to share here becasue I think it could be an encourigement and it's also a nice view of how I'd like this blog to grow over time. Although I'm blogging this on Wednesday I've found I can change the date hehe.

Anyway here it is:

Old wineskins can be soaked in oil and streached and made as new again. Old people are still relevant.

Recapturing joy can come from the Holy Spirit. Get fresh anointing to receive jopy and tenderness of heart.

Worship and prayer should be fresh anointing. In prayer and intercession we need tenderness. It makes sense to me that tenderness and intercession would go together and maybe that is why I find it quite hard to interceede because I've been let down so much (more on that later) but we have to have a soft heart for the people we are interceeding for, we have to love them.

Psalm 126:5 - 6 says "He who sows in tears reaps in joy" so we need to cry - tenderness and tears go together. God is looking for our tears - Jesus wept . There's no real harvest without tears and you can't have tears without tenderness.

Psalm 56:8 says "Every tear before God is noticed by God."

2 Kings 22:18-19 can be summed up as Responsive heart (to God) -> Weeping -> God responds

A cold heart can be caused by 3 things:

1) Sin (Hebrews 3:12)
2) Inner vows - When we vow to ourselves things like "I will never let anyone hurt me like that again", it makes us distance ourselves to people and I totally agree with that. I'd been hurt before and maybe I hadn't vowed it out load but I think sub conciously I had been. I'd been keeping myself away from people I didn't let anyone get close to me and I don't think I have still except for people who I really really trust and that's a problem for me, trust. I find it hard to care for people because I don't trust them unless I've come to a place of trust. I can't just trust people and I certainly find it very very hard to care for people I don't know which makes intercession hard for me because I don't love the people I'm praying for. When we do that, we loose our vulnerability and being vulnerable is part of being a christian. When we loose vulnerability our heart gets cold and we can't receive new things from the Holy Spirit and I can say that my heart is pretty cold sometimes
3) I guess this kind of links with 2) Unforgiveness - when Joseph heard about his brothers coming he wept for them. After everything that had happened to him by his brothers, he forgave them (and there was a lot to forgive).

We need to renew our wineskins and that can only happen through the Holy Spirit. So we need to pray "Give me a tender heart and tears and joy." Remove my inner vows, take them away, give me trust and love for people. Give us joy and laughter in your house and in your church. Take our bitterness away and give us a tender heart Lord."

After that we had a great time of ministy and I got prayed for. I've had so much disapointment with people and I really do want to be a good intercessor for people, I really do want to care for them and I think that over time and just by allowing myself to be changed, God (through the Holy Spirit) will do that.

I felt freer after the meeting. I'm going to add another entry about some other stuff that God is freeing me from and that I struggle with). I feel that now is going to be a time of great transition for me and I'm looking forward to what God is going to be doing in me and through me.

So Father, give me a tender heart, free me from my past disapointment with people and help me to love them and be weak to the world be strong in you. Help me to weep for the people in this town and country and world so you can come in power. Let me sow in tears, let me weep for the lost so you can come. Let me sow in tears and reap in joy. Yes Lord!